Venting!!!!!

(This is a picture that I took with my cell phone the other day while on a walk. The flowers are so pretty here in the spring. My mom told me that this a naked blossoming magnolia, I think. Its named that because it has no foliage (leaves) on the limbs, only these pretty flowers.)

I know I have not posted a "Post" in a while and so I figured that today would be the perfect day to do some venting and catching up. Well as most of yall know I am in nursing school full time and really don't have much in the way of time to think because between going to school, clinicals and working a full time job (only to keep a roof over my head, cause I don't suggest working while in school) I hardly have time to think.

So with nursing school, I only have 1 more semester left and will hopefully graduate in December (they don't offer summer classes). Well this semester has been interesting in seeing how much I can do without killing myself. I decided, against my councelors advicement, to take the full load of classes this semester. Which would include Gerontology, Obstetrics, Pediatrics, and Pharmacology. I did have the option to take pharmacology in the summer, which is what 99% of my classmates are doing, but decided that I wanted to be able to have the summer off, and start my final semester this fall, refreshed.

Well so far I am doing good in all of my courses and clinicals, besides pediatrics theory. I am barely above the water and am trying not to drown with the rest of the class, which out of 88 people, only 3 are actually passing. I am really close to passing and hope that this last test will bring it up to passing. So as you can see, it is not us, but the teacher that has the problem. This has been a continual problem in past semesters, but our semester is the first to stand up against her. It is literally this teacher's mission to try and fail us all, I kid you not, and because of racial tensions in the south, no one will stand up to her (because she is black, and are so afraid of a lawsuit that they would rather see us all fail than to do something about her teaching and testing methods. This is something that I have only seen in the south, by the way). But anyways.

Well to get to the point of why I am venting. I have been really freaking out that I will not pass this semester (because of freaking pediatrics) and will not graduate until May of 2010. So today I had 2 exams, one in pediatrics and one in pharmacology. Well the one in pediatrics is one of the last 3 exams that I have in this class, including the final, and I have to do good on them all in order for me to pass.

So needless to say, last night was an all nighter. So this morning driving to school, I was in tears because I have been so discuraged this semester because of not being able to do good in pediatrics and called my dear brother Stephan, and asked him to say a pray for me over the phone. It was very sweet and I know that the Lord helped in calming me down and helping me with the tests. So I found out right before I was on my way home from school that I had passed my pharmacology test, and was still waiting on the results of my pediatric test. I was so happy, and quite frankly couldn't believe that I passed the pharmacology test because I focused mainly on pediatrics.

I was on my way home (after having been awake for more than 24 hours), and was just so happy. I was within walking distance to pulling in my driveway, and I got pulled over. I know I was not speeding (because I have one of those nifty radar detectors, and I knew there was a cop around, so I was being good). Well the cop pulled me over. I just figured it was license and insurance check. Well he walks up, just as cool as he can be, and I asked what the problem was, in my cute little southern bell accent. He said, now get this, he said that he was pulling me over for the fact that my tint on my car was too dark. I was floored. I hate to say it, but I have been pulled over before in the great state of Alabama for speeding (hence the radar detector), and have not once been told that my tint was too dark. Then on top of that, I didn't have my current insurance card, I had everyone other one that I have had in the past 3 years but not my current one. And you know the funny thing, not once when I have been pulled over before, have I been asked for my insurance card, until this time. (Alabama doesn't require proof of insurance to get your tags renewed each year, nor do they require yearly safety inspection of your car. Because if they did, half the cars in this state would be condimed.)

Well needless to say he gave me a ticket for my car tint and no insurance. I said to him that he must have been really bored to give me these tickets, and he stuttered and said that "this was his job". Well I said to him, "Remember me if and when you have to come in the ER to be treated and I am your nurse and I decide not to dumb you before I stick a 10 inch catheter down your pee pee hole because "It's my job". I bet you'll be wishing you hadn't been bored that day when you gave me those stupid tickets." And I smiled at him just as smoothly as I could, and all he could get out of his jaw dropped expression was "Have a nice day".

Well needless to say, I called my mom just histerically crying cause I just feel like with every good thing that goes on with me, there is just as bad or worse a thing that comes shortly after. I just can't seem to find a happy medium. And I don't mean to be saying "poor pittiful me", but my whole nursing school experience has been filled with nothing but extreme lows and very little highs. I know that the advisary is working so hard on me to make me give up, and I also know that the Lord won't give me more than I can handle, but you know sometimes, I'm like "give me a break, in fact, give my mom, siblings and me a break". So every now and then, I meet my breaking point, and have a melt down. But (as my mom always says) "Besides that Mrs. Lincoln, how was the play?" Well I guess I am done for now, I know it is a long post, but I definetly feel better, and it gave me something to do while I sit here and wait to see if I passed my pediatrics test............

Well before I got done posting this, I got a phone call telling me that the grades were up. And the vertic is.....I GOT AN A. This is honestly the first A I have ever made on any of my nursing exams. I am a usual B average student, so needless to say, this has come as a shock to me. But yay me. The Lord really is on my side, I guess I just sometimes fail to realize it.